Posts Tagged ‘empathy’

The Cookie Thief!

December 18, 2011

I have the good fortune of lecturing professionally, and what I most enjoy presenting is the topic of communication between veterinarians and their clients. In every communication lecture I emphasize the importance of empathy. This involves veterinarians putting aside any preconceived notions and judgments about their clients so they can better recognize how their clients are feeling and what they are truly needing. In order to drive this point home during my presentation, I usually recite a poem I adore called, “The Cookie Thief.” While preparing a lecture earlier this week, it dawned on me that you might like this poem as well. Enjoy!

The Cookie Thief

A woman was waiting at an airport one night, with several long hours before her flight. She hunted for a book in the airport shops, bought a bag of cookies and found a place to drop.

She was engrossed in her book but happened to see, that the man sitting beside her, as bold as could be. . .grabbed a cookie or two from the bag in between, which she tried to ignore to avoid a scene.

So she munched the cookies and watched the clock, as the gutsy cookie thief diminished her stock. She was getting more irritated as the minutes ticked by, thinking, “If I wasn’t so nice, I would blacken his eye.”

With each cookie she took, he took one too, when only one was left, she wondered what he would do. With a smile on his face, and a nervous laugh, he took the last cookie and broke it in half.

He offered her half, as he ate the other, she snatched it from him and thought… oooh, brother. This guy has some nerve and he’s also rude, why he didn’t even show any gratitude!

She had never known when she had been so galled, and sighed with relief when her flight was called. She gathered her belongings and headed to the gate, refusing to look back at the thieving ingrate.

She boarded the plane, and sank in her seat, then she sought her book, which was almost complete. As she reached in her baggage, she gasped with surprise, there was her bag of cookies, in front of her eyes.

If mine are here, she moaned in despair, the others were his, and he tried to share. Too late to apologize, she realized with grief, that she was the rude one, the ingrate, the thief.

Have your preconceived notions about someone ever been completely upended? Do you think your veterinarian has preconceived notions about you?

Happy holidays to you and your loved ones,

Nancy Kay, DVM

Diplomate, American College of Veterinary Internal Medicine
Author of Speaking for Spot: Be the Advocate Your Dog Needs to Live a Happy, Healthy, Longer Life
Author of Your Dog’s Best Health: A Dozen Reasonable Things to Expect From Your Vet
Recipient, Leo K. Bustad Companion Animal Veterinarian of the Year Award
Recipient, American Animal Hospital Association Animal Welfare and Humane Ethics Award
Recipient, Dog Writers Association of America Award for Best Blog
Recipient, Eukanuba Canine Health Award
Recipient, AKC Club Publication Excellence Award
Become a Fan of Speaking for Spot on Facebook

Please visit http://www.speakingforspot.com to read excerpts from Speaking for Spot. There you will also find “Advocacy Aids”- helpful health forms you can download and use for your own dog, and a collection of published articles on advocating for your pet’s health. Speaking for Spot is available at Amazon.com, local bookstores, and your favorite online book seller.

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Communicating About Communication

November 8, 2010

I’ve just returned from the International Conference on Communications in Veterinary Medicine (http://www.iccvm.com).  This was a gathering of folks from all around the world eager to share their research, report their observations, and learn more about communication in the world of veterinary medicine.  The majority of information shared at this meeting pertained directly to how veterinarians communicate with their clients.  From my perspective, this is such exciting news! As little as a decade ago, barely a trace of research existed on the topic of client communication in veterinary medicine.  Now there are a reasonable number of studies underway, many of which are geared towards figuring out the best ways to incorporate and teach client communication within veterinary school curricula.  While the Canadian veterinary colleges seem to really be leading the charge in this research, what’s clear is that more and more veterinary school faculty around the world are grasping just how important it is to teach client communication skills to their students.  Hurray!

I was asked to provide a lecture/workshop for this meeting and chose, “The Internet and the Vet: How the Worldwide Web is Changing the Way We Communicate”.  I presented the data about email communication between veterinarians and their clients that you were privy to via this blog a couple of months ago (http://speakingforspot.com/blog/?p=1363). We also discussed how to interact with clients who do Internet research pertaining to their pet’s health (These days, who doesn’t do this?). We did some role-playing to try to identify ways to make our clients feel more comfortable when discussing their Internet research.  We all agreed that most clients are a bit bashful when broaching this topic- by doing so they fear that they may be conveying mistrust in their veterinarians.

Take home points emphasized repeatedly at this meeting were the importance of empathic communication (delivered verbally and nonverbally) and relationship centered care- the communication style that emphasizes collaboration between veterinarians and their clients. The payoff for utilizing this style of communication is greater job satisfaction for the veterinarian and greater client satisfaction with the services received.  I feel wonderfully fortunate to be practicing veterinary medicine at a time when a conference about communication in veterinary medicine exists. 

Over the years have you perceived ways that communication between you and your veterinarian are changing? If so, I would love to hear from you.

Now here’s wishing you and your four-legged family members abundant good health.  

Nancy Kay, DVM
Diplomate, American College of Veterinary Internal Medicine
Author of  Speaking for Spot: Be the Advocate Your Dog Needs to Live a Happy, Healthy, Longer Life
Recipient, American Animal Hospital Association 2009 Animal Welfare and Humane Ethics Award
Recipient, 2009 Dog Writers Association of America Award for Best Blog
Recipient, 2009 Eukanuba Canine Health Award
Become a Fan of Speaking for Spot on Facebook 

Please visit http://www.speakingforspot.com to read excerpts from Speaking for Spot. There you will also find “Advocacy Aids”- helpful health forms you can download and use for your own dog, and a collection of published articles on advocating for your pet’s health. Speaking for Spot is available at Amazon.com, local bookstores, and your favorite online book seller. 

Free Christmas or Chanukah guft wrap with books purchased between now and December 25th (www.speakingforspot.com/purchase.html).